Tuesday, September 28, 2010

"50 Things"

Ben Jones | August 23, 2006

Dear Class of 2010,

This will be my last entry written specifically for you; beginning with the launch of our new site in early September, I'll begin focusing on the future class of 2011. I hope that you guys won't be strangers; stay in touch either in person (come visit us!) or online (please drop by the blogs from time to time and say hi).

As you begin your college experience, and I prepare for my 10-year college reunion, I thought I'd leave you with the things that, in retrospect, I think are important as you navigate the next four years. I hope that some of them are helpful.

Here goes...

  1. Your friends will change a lot over the next four years. Let them.
  2. Call someone you love back home a few times a week, even if just for a few minutes.
  3. In college more than ever before, songs will attach themselves to memories. Every month or two, make a mix cd, mp3 folder, whatever - just make sure you keep copies of these songs. Ten years out, they'll be as effective as a journal in taking you back to your favorite moments.
  4. Take naps in the middle of the afternoon with reckless abandon.
  5. Adjust your schedule around when you are most productive and creative. If you're nocturnal and do your best work late at night, embrace that. It may be the only time in your life when you can.
  6. If you write your best papers the night before they are due, don't let people tell you that you "should be more organized" or that you "should plan better." Different things work for different people. Personally, I worked best under pressure - so I always procrastinated... and always kicked ass (which annoyed my friends to no end). ;-) Use the freedom that comes with not having grades first semester to experiment and see what works best for you.
  7. At least a few times in your college career, do something fun and irresponsible when you should be studying. The night before my freshman year psych final, my roommate somehow scored front row seats to the Indigo Girls at a venue 2 hours away. I didn't do so well on the final, but I haven't thought about psych since 1993. I've thought about the experience of going to that show (with the guy who is now my son's godfather) at least once a month ever since.
  8. Become friends with your favorite professors. Recognize that they can learn from you too - in fact, that's part of the reason they chose to be professors.
  9. Carve out an hour every single day to be alone. (Sleeping doesn't count.)
  10. Go on dates. Don't feel like every date has to turn into a relationship.
  11. Don't date someone your roommate has been in a relationship with.
  12. When your friends' parents visit, include them. You'll get free food, etc., and you'll help them to feel like they're cool, hangin' with the hip college kids.
  13. In the first month of college, send a hand-written letter to someone who made college possible for you and describe your adventures thus far. It will mean a lot to him/her now, and it will mean a lot to you in ten years when he/she shows it to you.
  14. Embrace the differences between you and your classmates. Always be asking yourself, "what can I learn from this person?" More of your education will come from this than from any classroom.
  15. All-nighters are entirely overrated.
  16. For those of you who have come to college in a long-distance relationship with someone from high school: despite what many will tell you, it can work. The key is to not let your relationship interfere with your college experience. If you don't want to date anyone else, that's totally fine! What's not fine, however, is missing out on a lot of defining experiences because you're on the phone with your boyfriend/girlfriend for three hours every day.
  17. Working things out between friends is best done in person, not over email. (IM does not count as "in person.") Often someone's facial expressions will tell you more than his/her words.
  18. Take risks.
  19. Don't be afraid of (or excited by) the co-ed bathrooms. The thrill is over in about 2 seconds.
  20. Wednesday is the middle of the week; therefore on wednesday night the week is more than half over. You should celebrate accordingly. (It makes thursday and friday a lot more fun.)
  21. Welcome failure into your lives. It's how we grow. What matters is not that you failed, but that you recovered.
  22. Take some classes that have nothing to do with your major(s), purely for the fun of it.
  23. It's important to think about the future, but it's more important to be present in the now. You won't get the most out of college if you think of it as a stepping stone.
  24. When you're living on a college campus with 400 things going on every second of every day, watching TV is pretty much a waste of your time and a waste of your parents' money. If you're going to watch, watch with friends so at least you can call it a "valuable social experience."
  25. Don't be afraid to fall in love. When it happens, don't take it for granted. Celebrate it, but don't let it define your college experience.
  26. Much of the time you once had for pleasure reading is going to disappear. Keep a list of the books you would have read had you had the time, so that you can start reading them when you graduate.
  27. Things that seem like the end of the world really do become funny with a little time and distance. Knowing this, forget the embarassment and skip to the good part.
  28. Every once in awhile, there will come an especially powerful moment when you can actually feel that an experience has changed who you are. Embrace these, even if they are painful.
  29. No matter what your political or religious beliefs, be open-minded. You're going to be challenged over the next four years in ways you can't imagine, across all fronts. You can't learn if you're closed off.
  30. If you need to get a job, find something that you actually enjoy. Just because it's work doesn't mean it has to suck.
  31. Don't always lead. It's good to follow sometimes.
  32. Take a lot of pictures. One of my major regrets in life is that I didn't take more pictures in college. My excuse was the cost of film and processing. Digital cameras are cheap and you have plenty of hard drive space, so you have no excuse.
  33. Your health and safety are more important than anything.
  34. Ask for help. Often.
  35. Half of you will be in the bottom half of your class at any given moment. Way more than half of you will be in the bottom half of your class at some point in the next four years. Get used to it.
  36. In ten years very few of you will look as good as you do right now, so secretly revel in how hot you are before it's too late.
  37. In the long run, where you go to college doesn't matter as much as what you do with the opportunities you're given there. The MIT name on your resume won't mean much if that's the only thing on your resume. As a student here, you will have access to a variety of unique opportunities that no one else will ever have - don't waste them.
  38. On the flip side, don't try to do everything. Balance = well-being.
  39. Make perspective a priority. If you're too close to something to have good perspective, rely on your friends to help you.
  40. Eat badly sometimes. It's the last time in your life when you can do this without feeling guilty about it.
  41. Make a complete ass of yourself at least once, preferably more. It builds character.
  42. Wash your sheets more than once a year. Trust me on this one.
  43. If you are in a relationship and none of your friends want to hang out with you and your significant other, pay attention. They usually know better than you do.
  44. Don't be afraid of the weird pizza topping combinations that your new friend from across the country loves. Some of the truly awful ones actually taste pretty good. Expand your horizons.
  45. Explore the campus thoroughly. Don't get caught.
  46. Life is too short to stick with a course of study that you're no longer excited about. Switch, even if it complicates things.
  47. Tattoos are permanent. Be very certain.
  48. Don't make fun of prefrosh. That was you like 2 hours ago.
  49. Enjoy every second of the next four years. It is impossible to describe how quickly they pass.
  50. This is the only time in your lives when your only real responsibility is to learn. Try to remember how lucky you are every day.

Be yourself. Create. Inspire, and be inspired. Grow. Laugh. Learn. Love.

Welcome to some of the best years of your lives.

-B

Monday, September 27, 2010

保留地

为你保留的那一块空间
荒废了一年的距离
我竟然连钥匙都握不紧

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Hell week ended

And dread week started...........

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Darkside of the Sun - Tokio Hotel

I am now in the darkside of the sun....
Who can come and brighten up my day ):
Tons of works are chaining my foot
and I cant run

Friday, September 10, 2010

I live in my own small world

I have a small shell
I live in it
My friends always ask where I have been going
I say
"I also don't know"
No one can find the door but only me
(:

Sunday, September 5, 2010

《你应该学会不相信》-- 龙应台


二十岁之前相信的很多东西,后来一件一件变成不相信。

曾经相信过爱国,后来知道“国”的定义有问题,通常那循循善诱要你爱国的人所定义的“国”,不一定可爱,不一定值得爱,而且更可能值得推翻。

曾经相信过历史,后来知道,原来历史的一半是编造。前朝史永远是后朝人在写,后朝人永远在否定前朝,他的后朝又来否定他,但是负负不一定得正,只是累积渐进的扭曲变形移位,使真相永远掩盖,无法复原。说“不容青史尽成灰”,表达的正是,不错,青史往往是要成灰的。指鹿为马,也往往是可以得逞和胜利的。

曾经相信过文明的力量,后来知道,原来人的愚昧和野蛮不因文明的进展而消失,只是愚昧野蛮有很多不同的面貌:纯朴的农民工人、深沉的知识分子、自信的政治领袖、替天行道的王师,都可能有不同形式的巨大愚昧和巨大野蛮,而且野蛮和文明之间,竟然只有极其细微、随时可以被抹掉的一线之隔。

曾经相信过正义,后来知道,原来同时完全可以存在两种正义,而且彼此抵触,冰火不容。选择其中之一,正义同时就意味着不正义。而且,你绝对看不出,某些人在某一个特定的时机热烈主张某一个特定的正义,其中隐藏着深不可测的不正义。

曾经相信过理想主义者,后来知道,理想主义者往往经不起权力的测试:一掌有权力,他或者变成当初自己誓死反对的“邪恶”,或者,他在现实的场域里不堪一击,一下就被弄权者拉下马来,完全没有机会去实现他的理想。理想主义者要有品格,才能不被权力腐化;理想主义者要有能力,才能将理想转化为实践。可是理想主义者兼具品格及能力者,几希。

曾经相信过爱情,后来知道,原来爱情必须转化为亲情才可能持久,但是转化为亲情的爱情,犹如化入杯水中的冰块──它还是冰块吗?

曾经相信过海枯石烂作为永恒不灭的表征,后来知道,原来海其实很容易枯,石,原来很容易烂。雨水,很可能不再来,沧海,不会再成桑田。原来,自己脚下所踩的地球,很容易被毁灭。海枯石烂的永恒,原来不存在。


二十岁之前相信的很多东西,有些其实到今天也还相信。
譬如国也许不可爱,但是土地和人可以爱。譬如史也许不能信,但是对于真相的追求可以无止尽。譬如文明也许脆弱不堪,但是除文明外我们其实别无依靠。譬如正义也许极为可疑,但是在乎正义比不在乎要安全。譬如理想主义者也许成就不了大事大业,但是没有他们社会一定不一样。譬如爱情总是幻灭的多,但是萤火虫在夜里发光从来就不是为了保持光。譬如海枯石烂的永恒也许不存在,但是如果一粒沙里有一个无穷的宇宙,一刹那里想必也有一个不变不移的时间。

那么,有没有什么,是我二十岁前不相信的,现在却信了呢?
有的,不过都是些最平凡的老生常谈。曾经不相信“性格决定命运”,现在相信了。曾经不相信“色即是空”,现在相信了。曾经不相信“船到桥头自然直”,现在有点信了。曾经不相信无法实证的事情,现在也还没准备相信,但是,有些无关实证的感觉,我明白了,譬如李叔同圆寂前最后的手书:“君子之交,其淡如水,执象而求,咫尺千里。问余何适,廓尔忘言,华枝春满,天心月圆。”

相信与不相信之间,彷佛还有令人沉吟的深度。